Very late night..can’t sleep.

We are lyin’ on the couch. We promised to share our recovery experience with you but only to a  point. Many things are sacred and a lot we DON’T share if you can believe that. This blog is more a summary of what we have learned in hopes that we can help someone else. Anyways.

When you live as a perpetual child for 40 years old, in illness, that won’t go near bathrooms and you wake up to reality it’s…..awful. There’s no other way to to describe it – perhaps, jarring. Tonight, just as the day we woke up to reality we felt/feel exactly like this:

warThe moment our 9 year old eyes saw the world through the eyes of a 40 year old in recovery. This emotion is still very much with us – It’s getting harder to fight, honestly.

Our world tonight, feels dark – we can feel it in our skin. Right below the surface.  Coming back into reality after multiple splits is terrible.

You don’t know who to trust (if anyone), you’re disorientated, frightened, alone, sometimes in literal shock and generally dealing with the chaos you’re alters might have wreaked. In this case however, we didn’t wreak any chaos. Reality simply came back into focus for us.

M and K